Smart Senior

At times it may seem that
grandparents are either “too old” or too ‘old fashioned’ to appreciate the
dynamics of a modern family.   Down deep
you know that family history and cultural values are important, but you
may not know how to bring everyone together. 
As a parent, how do you make sure that both your parents and your
children feel that they are a part of something truly wonderful?

Being a grandparent
should mean more than running a free babysitting service.  The word family implies that a relationship exists, and we all know
that relationships take work.  This topic
is addressed often in books and newspaper articles so the concept isn’t
entirely foreign.  Here are a few
suggestions that sounded good to me:

• Invite the grandparents along to the child’s
  activities.  No one can ever have
  too many people cheering them on. 
  Remember to take camp chairs or sports cushions along to make sure
  bleacher activities are comfortable for all.

• Invite the grandparents to your house rather
  than always going to theirs.  They
  shouldn’t have to feel that they have to put on a big spread every time
  you get together. 

• If the family does gather at your parent’s home,
  don’t forget to help with the dishes. 
  Stay at a hotel if you feel that noise and over stimulation will be
  an issue.  It isn’t just for their
  sake but for your own sanity as well.

• Find something fun that you can do
  together.  What about playing cards?
  The senior centers are filled with people who enjoy playing cards.   Kids like to play too.  Fun has no age limit.   Encourage grandparents to share their
  passions.  A grandparent who loves
  to cook or one with a passion for photography would be happy to share
  skills with others.  An evening of
  sharing could be an eye-opener at all.

• Grandparents may seem rude and inflexible to
  teenagers; and teenage angst may be more than a grandparent can
  stand.  As a third party you need to
  mediate and remind both that a little give and take on both sides is not
  only expected but important.

Older people often feel uncomfortable around
new and rebellious young people, but perhaps there are two sides to that
coin.     Encourage tolerance and communication.
  Drawing pictures, celebrating special
occasions, writing letters, sending e-mails and mementos are a start.   Vacation together.  Learn together.  Play together.