Smart Senior

Messed up and feeling sad? Have you ever noticed when you are talking to God, a therapist, or a best friend, that you tend to dwell on the bad/sad things you have done. There are some “things” that you can’t seem to forget no matter how hard you try. Being old gives you a little more perspective, but unbidden expectations persist.
Everyone makes mistakes. Whether questionable parenting practices, being too judgmental, being hurtful and unkind, or just plain making wrong decisions.
It’s a human thing, brought on by unrealistic expectations. From the day you were born you were expected to measure up, to be as good or better than everyone else. It’s a lot of pressure, and not easy to deal with.
Therapists will tell you that it is important to forgive yourself, to clear your mind, and to move on, but it isn’t as easy as one might suppose. There are some things that seem destined to be taken to the grave.
Believing in something intellectually is easy but believing it in your heart is something else. Your guru will tell you to be honest with yourself, own up to your mistakes and then let them go. Accept that what you did was dumb, ill-conceived, or hurtful and try to repeat them.
Give yourself a break. Understand that your ill-conceived decisions came from a place of fear and insecurity. It does not mean that you are a bad person.
Good people do dumb things. Try not to make it worse by obsessing over everyday failures like being late for school or not getting through your to-do list. Instead of obsessing over what you haven’t done, focus on the wins; make a “done” list and enjoy the moment.
Take care of yourself, mentally and physically. Talk to God. Talk to a friend. Talk to a therapist. Hang around with people who get you. Be a better person today than you were yesterday. As a parent or grandparent pass on your wisdom. Perfect isn’t all that it is cracked up to be.