What happened to good manners? Did our generation drop the ball? Did we assume that good manners happened by osmosis? Did we figure that some people are just naturally good-natured and well-behaved while others are not?
Parents don’t seem to notice, and grandparents are too afraid to speak up. They notice though. They write to advise columnists wondering what they can do. They are desperate for a solution that won’t endanger fragile relationships.
Think of examples in your own life. Here’s one: at a restaurant the other day we asked to move to another area because the children in a nearby booth were noisy and disruptive. Acceptable behavior, or not?
This isn’t always the case, but it happens often enough that people are starting to notice good behavior while ignoring the bad. Here is second example: a waitress at a popular restaurant, complemented a young couple because their children were so well behaved. It was true. The children were so well behaved that we weren’t even aware that a “family” was dining right behind us. I hope that family left knowing how extraordinary they were.
Manners are not just about using the right fork, elbows on the table, or not slurping when you drink. They are about learning how to behave in a socially acceptable manner.
Alas, good behavior and acts of kindness seem to be the exception rather than the rule. Of course there are still people who are kind, well-behaved, and hardworking. Smile at them. Complement them. Thank them. Let them know that you “see” them.
Manners and laws evolved because they were necessary to help people coexist in a peaceful manner. They became a key element in human society and are probably the reason that the species survived. If every person in a group looks out for only themselves, the group (society) would fall apart.
Think good thoughts about the parents and grandparents who teach children the importance of good manners. Good manners, after all, show others that you respect and care about them.
So, who is going to be responsible for teaching good manners to subsequent generations?
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